December 2011
55 posts
1 tag
deepomega: You can tell I’ve been drinking over lunch because of how certain I am that if I wanted to I could have been a [writer/doctor/lawyer/philosopher king/wrestler of bears/fameball]. I’m not saying it’s true, just that the alcohol clearly has its own opinions of my merits. I thought you already were a wrestler of bears.
Dec 22nd
1 tag
It's like my dad always said: "You can't write...
It’s 10 a.m. and the internet has yet to provide me with some frivolous thing to take umbrage with. I guess Deceleration Thursday is a real thing.
Dec 22nd
4 notes
Dec 21st
58,583 notes
Dec 21st
65,047 notes
Molly? →
aatombomb: Another Molly, sleeping her way to the bottom of the pile. Of the dozen moments when I should have been rushing to hit “Close Tab,” I think “On Thought Catalog and her personal blog, Ms. Calloway published similar accounts of sexual encounters with Internet acquaintances” was my favorite.
Dec 21st
24 notes
tmills: cordjefferson: Everyone make your Twitter bio “Master of the Computer Who Surprised the World” or “Power Incarnate with Endless Creativity.” I think I’ll go with “Eternal Bosom of Hot Love.” It’s a testament to how closed off North Korean society is. I’ve spent my whole life thinking I was the World’s Greatest Writer, when in fact it was KJI.
Dec 20th
7 notes
1 tag
Dec 20th
22 notes
awlcommentators: theawl: Attn. Awl Commentators: We might have fixed comment spam? Or at least we have launched a new initiative in the war. Give it yer best shot, if you like—and report any bad happenings or untoward side effects, if you please. RIP Comment Spam, you were often at least as unintentionally hilarious as Kim Jong-Il and far less threatening. How can you kill alexsmth114, if...
Dec 20th
13 notes
If I were a 30 under 30.
doctordisaster: tmills: I’d become an expert at Google Scholar, natch. Only an expert can deal with the problem The gag is that no one under 30 knows who Laurie Anderson is, right?
Dec 19th
19 notes
2 tags
“The horse jumped over the fucking fence.”
– Treating sports writing with the appropriate amount of reverence.
Dec 19th
It's a cute idea →
ideoplast: But until checks come in, I doubt the veracity of anyone claiming to “pay bands.”  If you really love music, pay the band you like money for their shirts and/or recording directly.  Enough with these pwecious third parties. Support your local indie merch table.
Dec 19th
3 notes
2 tags
Dec 19th
200 notes
1 tag
Dec 19th
6 notes
2 tags
Dec 19th
6 notes
YOU WERE SO BUSY TRYING TO COME UP WITH KIM...
Kim Jong-Il was a contrarian, and he could be a real asshole sometimes, but he was such an achingly honest and talented writer. I’ll miss him.
Dec 19th
30 notes
1 tag
The space between real life and parody is getting... →
Dec 16th
3 notes
1 tag
Strictly Alright: I’m not going to beat around the... →
strictlyalright: I’m not going to beat around the bush. The most intelligent thought I’ve had in the past few days has been, “so, someone who writes and thinks better than me, that makes most of the people I read on here, should write a thing about how two of the primetime soaps about upper-class New York - that’s… I’m just glad I’m not the only person who watches both GG and...
Dec 16th
Fixed
itsthe80sinmypants: muchlessmuchmore: “‘Dismal’ prospects: 1 in 2 Americans are now poor or low income are lazy “‘Dismal’ prospects: 1 in 2 Americans are now poor or low income should just get a job “‘Dismal’ prospects: 1 in 2 Americans are now poor or low income shouldn’t have been philosophy majors in college “‘Dismal’ prospects: 1 in 2 Americans are now poor or low income should become...
Dec 15th
1 tag
Fixed
“‘Dismal’ prospects: 1 in 2 Americans are now poor or low income are lazy “‘Dismal’ prospects: 1 in 2 Americans are now poor or low income should just get a job “‘Dismal’ prospects: 1 in 2 Americans are now poor or low income shouldn’t have been philosophy majors in college “‘Dismal’ prospects: 1 in 2 Americans are...
Dec 15th
the notes: Selected Incoherent Scribblings From A... →
thenotes: “Toothbrushes so cheap the bristles hurt” “Magic bullet info count to 5” “—Don’t worry, this watch is fast —Did you lie about your watch being fast? —I hate running” “Hobos descending on Dodd for 12-dollar lobster” “Shut up I lost my virginity to that song” “Plots — always just talking about… Much Less Much More is hereafter renamed “Confusing Aldous Huxley w/ Cliff...
Dec 15th
25 notes
2 tags
The benefit of not having read comics since 2003
I was a little kid and I didn’t make nearly enough allowance money in any given week to support my habit, so maybe once or twice a month I’d walk up to Vector Comics, and Tina (who was pals with my grandmother and one of the sweetest ladies you’ll ever meet) would pull out the stack of books that she had set aside for me: every Spider-Man book (in those days, it was Amazing...
Dec 15th
4 notes
Dec 14th
161 notes
1 tag
“Technology can help these kids. But only if the kids want to be helped.”
– It’s December 13. That means there’s only 18 more days for another quote to unseat this one as the most Flamingly Dickish, Un-Self-Aware, Clueless Bit of Privileged Nonsense of the Year.
Dec 13th
Dec 13th
7 notes
1 tag
Dec 13th
61 notes
2 tags
The only thing on Spin's Top 50 of 2011 list that...
is a country music album?
Dec 13th
Dec 13th
4,309 notes
1 tag
Dec 13th
563 notes
Dec 12th
5 notes
1 tag
Take up your scythe: You’re right, I did think too... →
doctordisaster: You’re right, I did think too hard about it. I wanted to not think about it! But there were long sections where nothing happened, or where I would get excited for a joke that never materialized, or where the movie threw heavy-handed advertisements at me; all of these things killed my… I saw this as more of a Wizard of Oz situation than a “the Muppets are actually...
Dec 12th
2 notes
1 tag
Seen: muppet movie
doctordisaster: Not seen: the point What’s it like to live in a world without joy?
Dec 12th
7 notes
1 tag
top 10 most hipster campuses →
itsthe80sinmypants: hiredgoons: ha, Emerson is #3. ha, my roommate’s an FIT to RISD transfer. The Combat Zone is not a campus.
Dec 12th
11 notes
1 tag
Hey genius:
doctordisaster: Your article is not “final” or “ready for layout” if it still contains a bunch of comments and tracked changes. If you leave tracked changes in your manuscript, I will fight you.
Dec 9th
6 notes
1 tag
Fortune Favors The Bold: Normally I’m concerned... →
brianvan: Normally I’m concerned about the Yankees winning (or, really, losing) only when they play about 4 or 5 teams. One of them just signed Bobby Valentine as their manager after having a fried-chicken-and-beer-imploding season, and the other just signed a 37-year-old (perhaps secretly older) first… And they paid an entire order of magnitude less to negotiate with Hiroyuki Nakajima...
Dec 8th
A Steak and Milkshake: It’s remarkable how often... →
asteakandmilkshake: It’s remarkable how often you’ll look through your tumblr dashboard and agree with just about every sentiment you find. It’s like Williamsburg; homogeneity with a veneer of individualism. We’re all liberal, to varying degrees, and tired of the same old bigotry and narrow-mindedness disguised as… Complaining about tumblr on tumblr is one of those kinds of posts! Meta!
Dec 7th
2 tags
cherrispryteaintsobrite: Why does the trailer for War Horse make me tear up uncontrollably?  Because for some reason we’ve decided to elevate horses over pretty much every non-housepet animal, and also most humans.
Dec 7th
4 notes
Editing is really depressing.
goodbyeolepaint: somethingofapseudonym: I know I need to do it, and it’s worth it in the end. But when I’m staring at my bad, unedited writing for hours on end, I just want to throw in the towel. Maybe I’m not cut out for this. Maybe I’m just no good. Everybody’s unedited writing is pretty bad!  Just gotta plough through it.  The solution is always to have someone else do it.
Dec 6th
23 notes
1 tag
Dec 6th
717 notes
Dec 6th
Dec 6th
6 notes
1 tag
Dec 5th
I just saw this hilarious thing called Keyboard... →
Dec 5th
7 notes
1 tag
No way to live
“Two legendary graphic novelists comic book writers— Frank Miller, creator of The Dark Knight Returns and hard-boiled Sin City, and Alan Moore, who wrote Watchmen and V for Vendetta — are finding themselves on opposite sides of a pretty gaping ideological divide regarding Occupy Wall Street and are expending a good amount of vitriol on the subject online.” I have a few life goals,...
Dec 5th
15 notes
2 tags
Eating my burrito with a spoon
Because they put guacamole in it instead of hot sauce. Gross.
Dec 5th
Dec 5th
67 notes
2 tags
On the train this morning, I glanced over at a guy heavily annotating a chapter of his trademark law textbook, the appendix of which was the lyrics to “Barbie Girl.”
Dec 5th
Dec 5th
9 notes
2 tags
WHOOPS! I seem to have stumbled onto a battlefield →
doctordisaster: The Senate has crammed a provision into next year’s defense spending bill that redefines every square inch of American soil as a “battleground”, in an effort to give the military the same powers of detention/assassination/what-have-you in Topeka as in Kabul. The President has promised to veto the bill if it retains the provision, but opposing the annual defense bill is considered...
Dec 5th
8 notes
itsthe80sinmypants: “The people who truly deface our neighbourhoods ar the companies that scrawl giant slogans across building and buses trying to make us feel inadequate unless we buy their stuff.” — Banksy (via alexander-johnson150) Also, people who paint things on buildings that don’t belong to them.
Dec 5th
44 notes
Dec 1st
25 notes